Feeling Strange

It’s been nearly two weeks of…

  • bed rest
  • a soft, gentle diet – bread, soups, porridge and 2 delicious Japanese meals which I really enjoyed…
  • no exercising – no gym, no walks…
  • hardly any teaching – most classes had to be cancelled

I’m frustrated that I’m not recovering as quickly as I want to, and it’s even harder to be letting people down over commitments I could not and for some, still cannot keep.

  • Cancelling classes especially for my students who are having their piano exams this month.
  • Not being able to teach in Sunday School.
  • Missing music practices at church.
  • Missing two BSF classes this month.
  • Not attending a counselling training at church.
  • Having to cancel my dinner date with my best friend.
  • Not being able to cook on my Cooking Day.
  • Not being able to see grandpa for two weeks, since my illness also disrupted our usual family schedule. 😦
  • Not showing up at the Young Adults’ Cell Group Thanksgiving gathering tonight.
  • Not being able to help out much at home. Mum having extra work to cope with since one brother was away travelling, another was having exams, and another was out of order (me).

Perhaps what is most challenging is trying to focus on prayer and Bible reading when I’m interrupted by uncontrollable hacking and coughing every 10-15 minutes. Going to bed is the worst… The home is silent, everyone’s asleep and you have to face the dread of having another sleepless and draining night.

In Zac Poonen’s sermon on the life of Job, Z.P comments, “Do we really believe, concerning everything that comes across our path, that God has planned it all in perfect wisdom and love, and that His power is almighty enough to deliver us from the testing, when the right time comes? Will God find in you and me those whom He can boldly point out to Satan as men who will never complain or grumble under any circumstance, but who will only give thanks for all things at all times?”

Gratitude is a choice. And I choose to say thank You Lord, even though I do not understand.

I can’t say I’m thankful to be sick…

But I am thankful for:

  1. A good physician and great nurses who cared for me while I was in hospital.
  2. Super caring pastors who came to pray for me, I was thoroughly ministered to by their prayers.
  3. Thoughtful friends and church and extended family members who also visited or messaged me to check on me.
  4. Books to read!
  5. The Internet – to keep me connected to all of you out there! 🙂
  6. Simple but comforting food – soups, porridge (cooked by mum) and lots of bread. Bread with jam, bread with ham, bread with pate, bread with pork floss…
  7. Manuka honey lozenges.
  8. Understanding students and parents who have been gracious and flexible with me. (Though I really hope I do not have to stretch their patience any longer!)
  9. A super-mum who has really been super all this while even though she’s battling with fatigue and a severe rash.
  10. God… Though I do not understand what plans my Heavenly Father has for me, I trust in His unfailing love.

Please do keep me in your prayers…

  • That my faith will be strengthened through this time of testing.
  • That I will have a good and gracious attitude… (getting a little difficult, I must admit)
  • For me to discover more about God’s love and grace even through moments of loneliness and despair.
  • That in my sickly state, that I would somehow still be a blessing to my family and those around me.

Sorry, so greedy with the prayer requests!

Happy Thanksgiving! I’m certainly grateful for all you subscribers and readers out there!

God bless you all!

Love and Peace,

Rachel

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