That which I thought was my alabaster jar wasn’t.
I was ready to leave the comforts of home, the love and closeness of family and friends and everything familiar and dear to answer His call.
How wrong I was.
My alabaster jar was something more sacred and vulnerable, more precious.
Fearfully refusing to release it thinking it would bring me security, when it was Christ to whom I should have clung on to.
In my selfishness I wanted to be in control in hopes that I would not be broken or hurt again.
Mary broke her alabaster jar in the willingness and deep gratitude of her heart.
YOU would not snatch that jar out of my hands.
This sacrifice must come from a heart willing to be broken, a life willing to be poured out, spilled freely to the ground.
In my innocence and naivety I did not realise the cost.
I was not prepared to be broken this way.
Anyone who desires to be a minister of His grace and gospel and salvation must first be broken and be prepared to be broken by the people you minister to.
I’m coming to a new place of dependency on Christ that I have not known before.
Pray for me. Pray with me.
“Our severest trials are God’s most powerful answers to our petition that He conform us to Christ’s image. They are His chisel on our hearts.”
“If with courage and joy we pour ourselves out for Him and for others for His sake, it is not possible to lose, in any final sense, anything worth keeping.
We will lose ourselves and our selfishness. We will gain everything worth having.”